Wan's World

Computer Problems

Tech Support

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to
Husband 1.0 and have experienced a slowdown 
in the performance of the flower and jewelry 
applications that had operated flawlessly 
under the Boyfriend 5.0 system.

In addition, Husband 1.0 has disabled other 
valuable programs such as Romance 9.9, and 
installed undesirable programs such as NFL 7.4 
and PGA 4.2. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, 
and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. 

I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these 
problems but without success. 

What can I do?

Desperate.

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Dear Desperate:

First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 was an 
entertainment package! , 
while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. 

Try to enter the command C :/ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME and 
install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically 
run the applications Guilt 3.3 and Flowers 7.5.

Caution: 
overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to such 
background applications like Grumpy Silence 2.5, 
Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Remember that Beer 6.1 
is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.wav 
files. 

DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.5, or reinstall another 
Boyfriend program! 
These are not supported applications and will crash 
Husband 1.0.. 

They could also cause Husband 1.0 to default to 
Girlfriend 9.2, which runs in the background and 
has been known to introduce serious viruses into 
the Operating System.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it 
does have limited memory and doesn’t learn new 
applications quickly. 
You might consider installing additional software to 
enhance the system performance. 

I personally recommend SingleMaltScotch 4.5 combined 
with such applications as that old stand-by Lingerie 6.9 
(which should also improve performance of 
Husband 1.0’s hardware).

Good luck! 
Tech Support