There once was pirate captain who, whenever it
looked like a battle would be imminent would
change into a red shirt.
After observing this behavior for a few months,
one of the crew members asked him what it meant.
“It’s in case I get shot. I don’t want you crew
members to see blood and freak out.”
“That’s very sensible, sir.”
At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile
ships on the horizon.
The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned.
“Get my brown pants.”