Wan's World

Day: May 7, 2012

  • Marketing

    WANPeople often get confused and mistake the meaning of the word “Marketing.”

    It seems that it is either too complex or too boring for people to remember.

    Here’s a very simple way to get your arms around it.

     

    1. You’re a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and say, “I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Direct Marketing.

    2. You’re a woman at a party with a bunch of friends and see a handsome guy. One of your friends goes up to him and, pointing at you, says, “She’s fantastic in bed.” That’s Advertising.

    3. You’re a woman and you see a handsome guy at a party. You go up to him and get his telephone number. The next day you call and say, “Hi, I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Telemarketing.

    4. You’re a woman and you see a guy at a party; you straighten your dress. You walk up to him and pour him a drink. You say, “May I?” and reach up to straighten his tie, brushing your breast lightly against his arm, and then say, “By the way, I’m fantastic in bed.” That’s Public Relations.

    5. You’re at a party and see a handsome guy. He walks up to you and says, “I hear you’re fantastic in bed.” That’s Brand Recognition.

    6. You’re at a party and see a handsome guy. He fancies you, but you talk him into going home with your friend. That’s a Sales Rep.

    7. Your friend can’t satisfy him so he calls you. That’s Tech Support.

    8. You’re on your way to a party when you realize that there could be handsome men in all these houses you’re passing, so you climb onto the roof of one of the houses situated in the middle of the complex and shout at the top of your lungs, “I’m fantastic in bed!” That’s Junk Mail.

     

     

     

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    9. You like it, but twenty years later your attorney says that you were offended by it, so you sue and you are awarded a big cash settlement.

  • Sex – Aboriginal Style

    WAN

    An Australian Aboriginal picks up a hooker.
    ‘How much do you charge for da hour, sister?’ he asks.  ‘$100,’  she  replies.
    He says ‘Do you do Aboriginal style?’  ‘No’  she says.
    ‘I pay you $200 to do it Aboriginal style’
    ‘No’,  she says, not knowing what Aboriginal style is.
    ‘I pay you $300’
    ‘No’, she says.
    ‘I pay you $400’
    ‘No’, she  says.
    So finally he says, ‘OK, I pay you $1,000 to do it  Aboriginal style..’
    She thinks, ‘Well, I’ve been in the game for  over 10 years now.
    I’ve had every kind of request from weirdos from  every part of the  world.
    How bad could Aboriginal Style be?”.
    So she agrees and has sex with him.
    They do it in every  kind of way and in every possible position.
    Finally,  after several  hours, they finish.
    Exhausted, the hooker turns to him and says,
    ‘Hey, I was expecting  something  perverted and disgusting.
    But  that was good. So what exactly is ‘Aboriginal style’?’
    The Aboriginal replies ‘You send da bill to da Gub’ment’