Day: August 20, 2013

  • An Affair

    A man returns home a day early from a business trip. It’s after midnight.
    While en route home, he asks the cabby if he would be a witness.
    The man suspects his wife is having an affair, and he wants to catch her in the act.
    For $100, the cabby agrees.
    Quietly arriving home, the husband and cabby tip toe into the bedroom.
    The husband switches on the lights, yanks the blanket back and there is his wife in bed with another man!
    The husband puts a gun to the naked man’s head.
    The wife shouts, ‘Don’t do it! I lied when I told you I inherited money’
    HE paid for the Porsche I gave you.
    HE paid for our new cabin cruiser.
    HE paid for your baseball season tickets.
    HE paid for our house at the lake.
    HE paid for your African tour and 4 x 4.
    HE paid for our country club membership, and HE even pays the monthly dues!’
    Shaking his head from side-to-side, the husband lowers the gun.
    He looks over at the cabby and says, ‘What would you do?
    The cabby replies, ‘I’d cover him with that blanket before he catches a cold.’

    WAN

  • A Blonde in church

    A Blonde in Church
    An Alabama pastor said to his congregation, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan.
    This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate.  I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this.  Now, I want the party who said this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family.”
    No one moved.
    The preacher continued, “Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood?  Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory.  Now stand and confess your transgression.”
    Again, all was quiet.
    Then, slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop a runaway train rose from the third pew.  Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, “Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding.  I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan.  I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets.”
    The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared.
    Life is Short, Smile.
    Give me an Amen, Brother!
    WAN
  • The search is over for the most stupid person in Australia!

    Almost unbelievable this letter writer signed their name to the letter ….
    The Search Is Over For The 
    Most Stupid Person In Australia!
    This is from letters to the editor in The Border Morning Mail, in Albury.

    20130821_The search is over for the most stupid person in Australia

     This might be stupid, but what about our curtains fading more for the extra hour of sunlight?