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New Species Discovered

- 25 January 2013, 12:01

They are referred to as “homo slackass-erectus” created by natural genetic downward evolution through constant spineless posturing, and spasmatic upper limb gestures, which new research has shown to cause shorter legs and an inability to ambulate other than in an awkward shuffling gait. The “drag-crotch” shape also seems to effect brain function.

Expect no eye contact or intelligent verbal communication. They receive food stamps and full government care. Unfortunately most are highly fertile.

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